I AM FREE!!

AND FREE INDEED!!!

today is the day that i will and must remember for the rest of my life.

this is the day that has changed my whole life around.

my whole life centers around this pivotal moment.

the day that i have been pining and yearning for, for years.almost my whole entire life.

the day that i have finally claimed LIBERTY! and i AM GOING TO WALK IN FREEDOM!

No longer will i be ensnared. no longer am i bounded. no longer am i going to believe in a LIE!

praise the LORD! 

I am a child of the Most High God.

NOTHING can ever take me from HIs love.

and today..this glorious day.. i have really tasted and seen that my God is good. 

fantabulously good. fantastic beyond my wildest dreams.

Wonderful, Magnificent God.

i have finally cleaned out my closet.

there are no more skeletons hanging there.

what has been such a burden on my heart, what has caused my heart to ache so much, to have it grief so much, to have my eyes cried so so much, has finally been lifted.

my shame, He has taken away. my pain, is HEALED in His Name!

it is such a wonderful feeling to be embraced by God.

i thank You for giving me such an understanding and wise mother.

i thank You for Your prompting and preparation of my heart for this.

i thank You for Your promise that indeed, Victory IS in Jesus.

i thank You, so much, for never giving up on me.

for never walking away.

for never retracting Your love.

for never failing me.

thank You.

my heart bursts in joy for All that You have done.

Wonderful Saviour, Marvellous Redeemer.

You are SO faithful, LORD. 

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. 

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? 

Actually, who are you not to be?

 We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

 And as we let our own light shine, 

we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."

- Marianne Williamson

mentioned in the movie "Akeelah and the bee"

its been a while since i last blogged.
life on the whole is quietening down to a low gentle hum.

is it good or bad?

hmm..for now.
it is somewhat deluding me into emo-ness.
i need something new to amuse or entertain me.
monotony isnt the way to go.
but what can i do?!
the dreaded CAs are on their way,and i am barely floating in my work.
i can't wait for the term break.

our lecturers this semester are quite funny. each have their own quirks.
they say funny/out of point/witty statements. which is fantabulous when you'e paying attention. haha.

perhaps i will blog more again when something more exciting happens to my life.
:)
or when i get a Sage- moment and blog something intellectual.
which rarely happens.
or something....

till the next post..adieu.

dear diary..
today, i finally hugged HUGGED russell.
he didnt just stand there like he usually does..
but he put his arm around me!
i'm so happy.
i love my cousin!
:)

love,
me

Give them all to Jesus

Are you tired of chasing pretty rainbows?
And are you tired of spinning 'round and 'round?
Wrap up all the shattered dreams of your life
And at the feet of Jesus lay them down

Chorus:
Give them all, give them all, give them all to Jesus
Shattered dreams, wounded hearts and broken toys
Give them all, give them all, give them all to Jesus
And He will turn your sorrow into joy

He never said, you'd only see sunshine
He never said, there'd be no rain
He only promised a heart full of singing
About the very things that once brought pain

And He will turn your sorrow into joy!

i'm laying them down at Your feet.
i'm tired of chasing pretty rainbows and losing my head.
in Your time

unmentionable
i'll stop the talking. i'll stop the thinking.
flip to a new page please.
i'll start the living. i'll start the breathing.
on your mark...

somethings are better left unsaid.


something has started and it wasnt i who hit the switch.

s l i p.

its easy to s l i p.
unconsciously i s l i p.
sometimes i hope to s l i p.
no hand to hold on to?
choosing to not walk right?
head in the clouds?

s l i p.

refresh my heart
refresh my heart, Lord
renew my love
pour Your Spirit into my soul
refresh my heart
You set me apart, Lord
to make me new
by Your Spirit lift me up, Lord
refresh my heart

And I will worship You, Lord
with all of my heart
And I will follow You, Lord
refresh my heart.


O God, my heart is the altar
And my love for you is the flame;
I’ll keep the fire burning for You, Lord,
And I will rejoice in Your name. —Hess

another long week ahead.
sustain me Lord.

this is my 650th post!
woah!

this week has been a rollercoaster of events.

monday:
first day of school. went for percussion audition.
but upon realising that i can't read notes, the lecturer kindly smiled me out of the room.owell.
i got my photography elective.yay.
fastest finger first is really exciting. your heart beats faster as the clock approaches the time for add/drop.
adrenaline.
the random allocation of design projects to groups is also very exciting.
i got a design project on past and future contact lens.
sounds interesting. =)
polymers here i come!

tuesday:
after lessons, i had FVT worship checkout.
but due to my ulcer on my tongue, that got worse after monday, i couldnt talk and sing properly.
eu kept "huh?"-ing me for 2 days. roar.
i had to leave early.
cos my family brought leo to the vet.
it was very hard. i kept crying.
from the house all the way to the vet.
why?
because we were going to put him down. he didnt respond to the medication and wasnt eating and drinking on his own. so it is better this way.
but i miss him alot. alot.
it really hurts.
13 years of my life..he's been a constant.
and now that he's gone..i dont see him when i walk into the dining and living area.
i dont hear him.
i cant touch him.
i cant touch him.
i miss having his face fit nicely between my two hands as i rub his face.
i thank God for bringing him into our lives, he had so much character and personality.
no one else bullies me like he did.
he was a great companion to have. couldnt have asked for any dog better.
i miss him.

we didnt witness him being put down.
i wish he was imperishable.

wednesday:
school yet again. had photography elective.jonsiew mengchoo jovian and justina are all in the elective with eu drew and i. =)
had our first Xroads session for the sem. did emcee-ing with tweet.
it was fun.
i was quite high after Xroads. i'm seriously addicted to being around people.
its almost scary.
Thank You for allowing everything to flow smoothly. :)

went to church after supper. it was quite fun. got to hang out with the youth.
and elvin is a monkey. i woke up with a minty smell...why?because while i was sleeping..that monkey put colgate on my left sleeve. argh.

thursday:
HAPPY 42nd birthday singapore!
happy 22nd birthday albert!

after the stayover in church..i went home and slept for a while before heading out again to marina square to meet the rest to celebrate Tweet's birthday.
glad i got to see the seniors again. and wishing albert "happy birthday albert!" every 10 mins was hilarious. haha.
went to shuying'se house to play mahjong and other games.
i hardly won. roar.
and jem "worries" each time i get my flower or a "tai" cos then i can go on a random rampage and anyhow end. haha!
had dinner with jason at causeway pt..which was great too! cos i got to talk to him. =)
thanks Jason for always accompanying me and all. and being such a good friend. :)

friday:
had school. had meeting.
cut my hair short.
went dinner at morton's steakhouse at oriental hotel.
shiok until buay tahan.
its so mahal. but so worth it.
happy birthday uncle philip! [in advance!]

staying over at caroline's tomorrow. watching tim's gig too.
how exciting my life is.


i'm tired.

I have tasted and i've seen that You are good.

You Are a Good Friend Because You're Fun

You are energetic, amusing, and always up for a good time. Optimistic and genuinely happy, you help people see the sunny side of life. And you're always up for a party... no matter how big or small. You're usually the first one to celebrate a friend's success. Anyone who's interesting or fun is welcome in you circle of friends. You're not the type of person to exclude or make fun of someone who's a little different. Your friends need you most when: They're down or depressed You really can't be friends with: Anyone who's stuck up or chronically unhappy Your friendship quote: "It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."

What Makes You a Good Friend?

true?

a look at the more important things in life..

today, i was walking to my train station..
and i passed by this lady wearing a sarong and using an umbrella..
she glanced at me as she walked towards the grass, away from the cement pavement..
i saw her bend down and take her slippers off..
then she held them in her hand and gingerly continued walking on the grass..
it seemed like she had a slight tilt at the sides of her lips..

its amazing how one's words does reflect what his/her brain constantly dwells on.
do you constantly talk about a certain topic?
does it reflect your innermost desire?
don't hide it. don't deny it.
the world might already know.

my dog is sick.
it hasnt fully sunken into my head that i might lose him soon.
its taking its toll on not only his body, but on my family.
especially on audrey.
both physically, emotionally and mentally.
thanks jie.
its sad to see him so sick.
when it was he who caused us to spend so much energy catching him to bathe/stop barking/getting things from him that shouldnt be his.
now..my sister spends her energy trying to get him to eat.
not only his medicine..but any form of sustenance.

i was staring at him just now..he's so gaunt.
no longer our "fatty".

its been a good 13 years..and i guess its almost time to say adieu.
but its not easy.
he's a part of us already.


slow dancing

I saw the LIght
Words and music by Hank Williams
1948

I wandered so aimless, life filled with sin;
I wouldn't ask my dear Saviour in.
Then Jesus came like a stranger in the night;
Praise the Lord, I saw the light!

Chorus
I saw the light, I saw the light.
No more darkness; no more night.
Now I'm so happy no sorrow in sight.
Praise the Lord, I saw the light!

Just like a blind man I wandered alone,
Worries and fears I claimed for my own.
Then like the blind man that Jesus gave back his sight;
Praise the Lord, I saw the light!


Chorus
I saw the light, I saw the light.
No more darkness; no more night.
Now I'm so happy no sorrow in sight.
Praise the Lord, I saw the light!

I was a fool to wander astray,
For straight is the gate and narrow is the way.
Now I have traded the wrong for the right;
Praise the Lord, I saw the light!


Chorus
I saw the light, I saw the light.
No more darkness; no more night.
Now I'm so happy no sorrow in sight.
Praise the Lord, I saw the light!


Psalm 46:1
"God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble."

tommy emmanuel sang this song acapella on saturday.
=)

refresh me daily.

WARNING: this is going to be a rambling, random post. so if you're up for it please read on.

i miss tandoori chicken from Can A.
i miss school.
but at the same time, it sickens me a lil that school is about to start.

i have not done all that's on my to-do list for the holidays.
my room is still a sky blue.
its supposed to have made friends with pink and yellow by now.
my room is still a surprise-me room, and not an alphabetical one.

i have 3 weeks left.
one week for Leader's conference.
one week for FOC.
one week to unwind, preferably at Sentosa, a pub and a coffee joint.
and then the shocker of it all when school kicks in,
and on the inside, i would keep wanting to fight the feeling of being back in school.
and before you know it, common tests hit you right in the face.
sighh.

i'm growing up too fast.
i want to be a toys'r'us kid forever.
i know my wife would love to join me.


worship was a lil messy today.
me played quite a number of wrong chords, using the wrong sounds,at the wrong times.
sigh.
drummer played a few messy beats out of the blue.thankfully it was kinda minimal.
worship didnt climax as well as it could have.
i need to improve on my synthe playing. my ears are not tuned.
if i had tunas for ears..maybe i'll be better off? haha. joke. laugh please.

it felt good to be back in church.though i still miss worshipping with the thousands.
i missed my youths, and my cousins quite a lot.
i'm praying for a new anointing in our worship meetings, that our congregation will once again come back to the heart of worship and just really adore our Lord, passionately, for who He is.

got my letter that i wrote to God, during last year meta camp. Ju sent the letters back out to us.
and yay. in my letter, whatever i asked of God, i can see it coming to pass in my life now.
it makes me just feel so happy. to know that hey, there is Someone who has my back and IS watching over me. wonderful security, i say.

last night i came up with new words..
dumb+funny= dunny
retarded+funny=renny
crazy+funny=funzy.

i want to go to a lazy quaint town, to just sip a cup of coffee and people watch.

if i wasnt called andrea..i wonder what name would suit me.

i can't wait for tommy emmanuel's concert this saturday. my ears are all pumped(not literally) for new tunes.
i love concerts and performances, makes you feel inspired and pensive and happy all at once.

i miss chemistry and physics practicals. either with mr Loh or piangpiang.

ok. i need chocolate.

ONION HAS YOOUU!!!

I AM BACK FROM KOREA!!

and missing it like crazy.

it was fantastic fun. too many things to blog about. will do so..
er.. soon.

anyhoo..
this entry is for jason. cos he asked me to blog about it. so i shall. cos why? cos i am a good girl.

okay. entry title..: one more requirement i wish to have in my future boyfriend..should God permit.(HAHA!)

to bring me on excursions!
esp. to the streets with weird names, in singapore! YEAH!

i came up with it when i passed by Kay Poh street.

just to walk through it would be suffice.company is more impt. and who knows..we might discover more exciting stuff about Singapore!

someone who has a kid in him. but matured too.
and does things in the spur of the moment. (not all the time mind you. cos i am, above all, a creature of habit.)

any takers? haha!
(zixiang..stop pointing at yourself.i know you are.haha!)

it has been a great day.
learnt new stuff.
got my heart broken by the prices of somethings.
totally totally satisfied the voyeur in me.
shared God's Word with His people in the spur of the moment. again.
when your heart starts to beat faster, you just can't fight it.

and i Thank You.

why die hopelessly, wondering why?
there IS hope beyond the grave.

YYAAYYY!!
KOREA HERE WE COME!!
haha!
about 200+ singaporean crusaders would be INVADING busan, korea tonight!
haha!

i'm so excited!
i'll be gone till the 9th of july. so please please PLEASE don't call me!
cos i wldnt answer. =)

we're going down for a conference and also for a 4 days rural mission.
its exciting. i am anticipating a personal encounter. and to just see how God is moving in asia.
abt 14k koreans and about 3-4k international delegates are going down.
yay!


so i'll look to YOU

miss me!!

its like walking along a path that has no end.
can i give up now?
but i can't sit down.
too many voices. too little will.

sigh.

i'm still a little high and joyful from saturday's worship.
wow.
its like a continuous smile on the inside. haha!

times of refreshing, here in Your presence.
there's no greater joy, Lord, than being with You.

You Are a Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich

You life your life in a free form, artistic style. You are incredibly creative and at times, quite messy. Deep down, you are a kid at heart. And you aren't afraid to express it. Your best friend: The Grilled Cheese Sandwich Your mortal enemy: The Club Sandwich

What Kind of Sandwich Are You?

p.s: please look at eugenia's blog.HAHA!

of all the things to do..

Your Brain is Orange

Of all the brain types, yours is the quickest. You are usually thinking a mile a minute, and you could be thinking about anything at all. Your thoughts are often scattered and random - but they're also a lot of fun! You tend to spend a lot of time thinking about esoteric subjects, the meaning of life, and pop culture.

What Color Is Your Brain?

You Are a Chocolate Cake

Fun, comforting, and friendly. You are a true classic, and while you're not super cutting edge, you're high quality. People love your company - and have even been known to get addicted to you.

What Kind of Cake Are You?

to eugenia: " and have even been known to get addicted to you". haha!

Your Monster Profile

Death Nightmare You Feast On: Fried Chicken You Lurk Around In: Closets You Especially Like to Torment: Pop Stars

What's Your Monster Name?

HAHAHA!!

You Are Animal

A complete lunatic, you're operating on 100% animal instincts. You thrive on uncontrolled energy, and you're downright scary. But you sure can beat a good drum. "Kill! Kill!"

The Muppet Personality Test

AH-NEE-MALL!! =)

You Should Drive a Pink Car

You're the type of driver who really loves your car. You can make a car last for ages - or take good care of a vintage ride. You're independent, creative, and very expressive. You consider your car a part of you ... and you want to make it as funky as possible.

What Color Car Should You Drive?

misty - sung by ella fitzgerald.
Look at me, I'm as helpless as a kitten up a tree;
And I feel like I'm clingin' to a cloud,
I can' t understand
I get misty, just holding your hand.

Walk my way,
And a thousand violins begin to play,
Or it might be the sound of your hello,
That music I hear,
I get misty, whenever you're near.

Can't you see that you're leading me on?
And it's just what I want you to do,
Don't you notice how hopelessly I'm lost
That's why I'm following you.

On my own,
When I wander through this wonderland alone,
Never knowing my right foot from my left
My hat from my glove
I'm too misty, and too much in love.
Too misty, and too much in love.

just never learn in time.
its gone now.
even if i try to salvage as much as i can.
its still gone.
i just have to make do with something lower.

i just never learn.

its always at the last minute that i try to salvage things.
but its never good enough.

regret is kicking me.
and in full hard blows.

i hope i wake up this time round.

all dolled up.
cam-whoring.
smiling.
cam-whoring.
solemnisation.
holy matrimony.
congratulatory.
dinner.
yum-seng.
greetings.
bed.

.my cousin's wedding.

it was great fun. first time having a wedding for a close/immediate relative.
=)
i'm so happy for my korkor and his pretty wife, suzen.


so since i'm in the oh-so-fuzzy-blissful feeling.
thought i'll just upload songs that always never fail to make me feel warm and fuzzy.
haha. =)

[yes yes. i know i've been uploading alot of youtube videos. its amazing how time flies when you're watching youtube. the related links sidebar is evil.]

time for bed. goodnight. enjoy.

butterfly kisses - Bob Carlisle
appeals to the "Daddy's girl" in me.



wonderful tonight - eric clapton
the introduction already brings such warmth. -beam-

Out of my mind. - john mayer
i'm putting you baby
i'm putting you right out of my mind
i'm putting you baby
i'm putting you right out of my mind
so tired of running after you girl
and being one and one half steps behind

go tell your friends now
go tell your friends what johnny did
go tell your friends
go tell your friends just what johnny did
if they don't tell you that you're crazy baby
lord, they're as messed up as you is!

sing me the blues.

All God's children got rhythm - June Christy
Children, listen here to me
this is my philosophy to see me through the day
to scare my cares away

all God's children got rhythm
all God's children got swing
maybe haven't got money
maybe haven't got shoes
but all God's children got rhythm for to chase away the blues

all God's children got trouble
trouble don't mean a thing
when they start to bop-a-clu-a-bop-a-bop trouble's bound to go away.
say all God's children got swing

roger : "haha. you should blog it!"
me: "YEAH! God is REALLY GOOD!! my academic life is really by grace.haha!"


SHOUT IT FROM THE TOP OF THE WORLD!! MY GOD IS FANTABULOUSLY GOOD!THANK YOU!!

my exam results are out!
though my grades really arent fantastic. i did not fail anything!
and i am really thankful for that!

it was the worst exams of my life! for real.
i hardly studied.
i only read through my notes once. browsed through past year exam papers once.
and then went and sat for my papers.
2 of them were really really dreadfully horrible.
its like i almost submitted a blank piece of paper. or worst..one filled with nonsensical nonsense.

but i thank God.
i'm not proud of my studying discipline.
for goodness knows how long..i've been praying for discipline for so many years. and yet eventhough i dont fulfill my duties as a student very well.
God..my amazing amazing God..still sees me through my exams..
when i put in such minimal effort..He still gives me peace when i study..
He allows me to remember things in the exam hall when i get stumped.
its really not by my own strength. its all YOU, Lord. its all You!

even if i did fail some, i would still say my God is good. He didnt leave me alone when i went through my exams. and that..i know really well. =)

what can i do? but thank You.
overwhelmed

fred astaire. gene kelly. bing crosby. ginger rogers.


what do they have in common?
the ability to sing and dance and make my heart beat faster.

i love classic films.the music, the dances, the wit, the romance.

fred astaire is my new hero.gentlemanly and so smooth in his steps! and his voice..oh goodness.




'nuff said.

thursday found me at palawan beach.
sporting a new pair of shades too! haha. finally got one.

i went there with my church youth. so glad we all got to hang out together again.
it has been a while. and i loved it. they are so funny, and cute, and kuku, and witty. haha.
i love wit. i find it very appealing.
and yes..i think many of the boys are gonna grow up and be lady killers. hahaha.
we played vball on the hot sand, and they played vball and soccer with some other guys.

haha. my rebecca showed off her soccer skills. i'll admit that she did quite a good header.
OH! and my dear russell chow..has a distracting-soccer move.
he runs around screaming and waving his arms in the air as he chases the person with the ball.
its SUPER funny to watch! i recorded it down. and you can hear me say "hahaha. my cousin is so retarded" in the background.
HAHAHA!

the rain surprised us, and we all cozied under a small shelter.
thankfully it wasnt too long, so we went out to cycle.
my bike seat was a lil too high, so i didnt want to stop, lest i toppled over and fell.
but we stopped a few times..so i guess thats why my butt kinda hurts now..cos it takes me alot of effort to get back on. much to tif-taf's and tommy's amusement i might add. roar. those two are very naughty. hahaha.

rebecca and i cam-whored for a while after. and it was great fun.

all in all...

THANK YOU LIL MUMMY JANELLE!!

all i did was to say "hey. let's all go to sentosa to tan la! our church so near, but we never go there! you all having holidays soon right? let's go la!"
and on that night itself..my lil mummy janelle got to work and organised it. =)

i'm super proud of you girl! you planned it brilliantly. we all had a blast. -hug-



-takes photo-

me: aiyah. its off-center. delete. take again.

-takes photo-

me:aiyah. its off-center again!
russ: huh. its not off-center what. i'm in the center!
me: roar! hahaa.



friday came along..

note: i dont really like handwashing clothes.

met twin[jessica] on the way to town. we took 190 down.

it started to rain while we were on the bus. dark clouds, raindrops hitting against the window, and my ipod was playing "have yourself a merry little christmas".
and yeah! it really did feel like christmas!
i felt all warm and fuzzy inside.
perhaps i should listen to carols when it rains. then i can have christmas more often! yippee! =)

so twin and i alighted.ate meesua at wisma. and had shiok-a-delic mango pudding with sago for dessert.
then the hunt was on!
i have to desperately get a dress for my cousin's wedding. which is like..next week!
but alas...mission was not accomplished. i didnt manage to find one.
but at least now i have a better gauge of what i want. hmm.

met others for dinner at botak jones [clementi]. phwoar. its really really very shiok la! the meat is flavoured nicely, and juicy too. loved it. was really full.
but what was better than the food..was the company. [though many unglam shots were taken.haha.] =)

thanks babes for coming out to play! especially you twin..for keeping me in such splendid company the whole day.



yet in the midst of it all..when its just You and me. Your voice calls out so clear.
i don't deserve such grace. i don't deserve such love.
i may fool the whole world, but i can never fool You.
though i come to You broken and ugly, You still see beauty.
"everyone has their own wars to fight."
and as the song goes "the victory is mine, when the battle is the Lord's."
its in Your hands. i surrender. i'm weak.
i need You. i so desperately need You.

Come to me Lord, here is my heart. can't live on my own. can't live without You.

Jesus, what a beautiful Name.

Light in your eyes - blessed union of souls

I can't remember the last time that we kissed goodbye
All our "I love you"s were just not enough to survive
Something your eyes never told me
But it's only now too plain to see
Brilliant disguise when you hold me
And I'm free

I've been thinking and here's what I've come to conclude
Sometimes the distance is more than two people can use
But how could I have known girl
It was time and not space you would need
Darling tonight I could hold you and you would know
But would you believe

There's a light in your eyes that I used to see
There's a place in your heart where I used to be
Was I wrong to assume that you were waiting for me
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me

Cards and phone calls and photograph pictures of you
Constant reminder of all the things you get used to
Is there a chance in hell or heaven
That there's still something here to build on
Or do you just pick up the pieces after they fall
But after all

There's a light in your eyes that I used to see
And a song in the words that you spoke to me
Was I wrong to believe in your melody
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me?

Should I keep on waiting or does love keep on fading away
Fading away

It's been a while since I've seen you so how have you been
Did you get my letter I wrote you but I did not send
I tried to call your old number
But the voice that I heard on the phone
I recognized but she told me the number was wrong

There's a light in my eyes but it's too bright to see
And a pain in my heart where you used to be
Guess I was wrong to assume that you were waiting here for me
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me?

Your unfailing Love
When the darkness fills my senses,
When my blindness keeps me from Your touch,
Jesus come.

When my burden keeps me doubting,
When my memories take the place of You,
Jesus come.

And I'll follow You there
To the place where we meet,
And I'll lay down my pride
As You search me again.

Your unfailing love,
Your unfailing love,
Your unfailing love over me again.

i've got a new nickname.

krystie: hello krystie!
me: no no! i'm back to being jiejie andrea again! i swapped my names back with you already. [krystie reanne and i exchanged names last weekend.]
reanne: andra!
me: no..its an-drey-er!..its drey-er..
krystie: dry-er...
reanne: andra..
me: oh goodness. its drey-er..ddrreeeyy-eerrrr. not andra!
krystie and reanne: dry-er!
me: drey-er!
them again: dry-er!
krystie: hair dryer!!
me: oh goodness! hairdryer?! phwoar..fainted.
both of them: dryer! dryer! hairdryer!
me: aiyoh! i dont want to talk to you already la! haha.

-walks away-

and being the little kids that they are..they were following me and calling me by my new "endearment".



i've never been called a hairdryer before. -sob- haha.

are there such things as holiday blahs?
if there are..
i think i'm suffering from it.

my heart isnt feeling well today.
not well at all.

the want to rant, the want to ramble, the want to be random, the want to be heard.

holiday blahs.





blah.



for every high, there comes a low.
things can only go up from here.

its like wanting to scream with a masking tape across your mouth.
its like stamping your feet on the floor, even if it doesnt make a sound.
its like struggling for air, but a weight is pulling you down.


save me from myself.

its a journey i'm willing to take with You. I know You would not let go of my hand.thank You.

we had north ST meeting today.
longest meeting i've ever had.
9am-930pm.
haha. but surprisingly i'm not tired.
rather..charged up!
after all our sharing of the plans for the different Comms, i think...
its going to be an exciting academic year for Crusade in Ntu.
i'm looking forward to serving in the Servant Team alongside Champ, tweet, anton, bok-ah-wee, eu, huimin, selina and derek.

please continue to pray for our team for sensitivity to God's guidance and heart for the ministry, for the challenging of subcommers [for their hearts.] and for love in not only the ST, but crusade as a community.

God's Hand is moving in NTU. and i'm glad to be in this movement.
OOOWWHEEE!! its going to be exciting.
an adrenaline working with God. yeah!


our God is an AWESOME God.
i want to hold You, love You, dont let You go.

watched a midsummer's night dream today.
it was fabulous.
it was a first for me..

i loved watching the people around me..
they were so relaxed..with some armed with a glass of wine while lazing on their mats.
and i was just trying to soak in the atmosphere as much as i could.
i loved it.
i would love to go for another open air performance at the fort canning again.
gorgeous. the skies..the air..the everything! =)

the performance was good too!
it totally amused me when they added our own local flavour to it..
"yi er san..wo men shang..wo men xia..wo men hou qian jiao....sally sally long jiam pass!"
hahaha!

i went with my sister, her colleague and 19 of her sec 3 lit kids.
thankfully priscilla was patient enough to explain to me. that girl knows her work man. haha.


how is it that falling in love..and being lovers seem so easy when shakespeare writes it.
is it because one thinks too much..that causes one to not fall so hopelessly?
is that a good or bad thing?
is it because of what others might think, when you're so deeply in love that it consumes you, that holds one back?

if one is to write a book..
would a book written with ideals sell better than one that was real?

its funny how ideals appeal so much to us more than reality.

funny.


if only everything was simpler.

OKAY!! i'm FINALLY going to do it!
HAHAHA. its like..what..2 mths overdue?
-huge grin-
i hope i remember every single detail..
alright.
please step into my timemachine..and i'll bring you back to when i just turned 21. haha!

here we go.....

i was out on the 21st of march with my aunt jen. looking for my present. [which is my heart diamond pendant + necklace! ] in town.

and i received an sms from my dear eugenia..
"Ladies, i'm helping my fren with a survey. Need to know wat flowers you like. :) reply asap? Thankies ;) "
and i replied "blue roses!"
so when i came back to school..
i went to the ADM rooftop for DG with joyce, caroline and sufang!
Joyce was so sweet! she bought me a slice of cake..and SPARKLERS! [i love sparklers!]
so we sang happy birthday!
THEY sang it like..21 times!! everything that i did..started them off singing another round.
hilarious la! hahaha.then we played with sparklers. and ate SUSHI! joyce bought sushi! and we had other food too that we brought along. it was great.
and so i asked miss caroline.."is anything going to happen tonight?? am i supposed to be scared??"
and she kept pretending and saying that i shldnt.
my miss loh also! she kept pretending and said " huh? i really dont know!" quite convincingly at that too.

so anyhoo..
after DG [which was ever so heart warming].. caroline and i went back to hall.
bathe and all. and i just felt so..RAH! cos i was going to turn old. and i wanted to fight the clock.
so i was a lil mopey..and caroline had to study..so she only came into my room when it was nearing 12 to count down with me.
jessica came too!
and so..we were just sitting around in my room..waiting to countdown..
then caroline slyly asked yeyin for her number! [though she already had it and was just messenging her that a whole bunch of people were coming down. i found this out later on.]
suddenly..out of yeyin's norm..she went to check her reflection in her mirror. so i suspected a bit. but didnt pay too much attention.
so when the clock hit 12..i sang happy birthday to myself.
and yeyin and i took photo together.
then suddenly..
my room door flung wide open!
and a whole bunch of people were outside my room with a cake! and eu gave me a blue rose!
i really was quite stunned! i didnt expect soO many people! it was crazy la!
haha. so they sang happy birthday..i blew out the candles. and we were on our way down to the tv lounge...
when suddenly 2 girls jumped out at me singing..
" oh why were you born so beautiful! oh why were you born at all!..."
i was so stunned at seeing Feng and Shir that i collapsed onto the floor!
and i started crying.
i didnt expect them at all la! at ulu pulau nanyang! my goodness!
i was so so happy!
haha

so the whole parade went down to the tv lounge..and my rachel tay made her appearance too!
yay!
we cut cake..and kinleong and anton and i dont know which other cheeky one..picked up a snail on their way and wanted to give it to me! haha.
we took photos!
and then shir rach and feng wanted to go off..
so i walked them out..
and suddenly everyone was coming along..
in the next moment..i felt wet from the back..and i ran a bit..turned..and to my amazement!
never in my life would i think that i would get pranked by VEESAN!
they put mentos into a 1.5L coke bottle and she sprayed it on me!

when i was recovering from shock..the next thing i knew..
porkie was holding on to my right arm..and yeye on my left.
and they made me run! RUN!
i couldnt stop running even if i wanted to..or else i would have been dragged!
they made me run to the NIE pond..which was like..100m away? [ok. i dont know how to gauge. but it was quite long!]

when i got there..i was given sometime to contemplate if i wanted to go into the pond..
which yeye was so fervently disagreeing and just wanted to throw me in.
i didnt really mind la..at least its smth to remember..but..the thought of a murky pond..was really quite gross.
so then..kinleong and yeye.. though i managed to run a way for a while..before getting caught again..
flung me into the pond.
GROSS!
the floor was like.....was like...soft soft..gooey a bit.
thank goodness i didnt smell la!
everyone was running away from me..the swamp thing! wahaha!
i rolled myself dry on rachel's car. haha.

after saying goodbyes..
i went to bathe..AGAIN.
and went to bed.


22nd march!actualy birth date!

thankfully we were having our e-learning week.
and without having to skip class..
eu drew and i had the entire day free!
yippee!!

so we met at 11+ am..took train to city hall to get my dress for my party.
and headed to CARNIVORE at vivo.
phwoar..it was shiokadelic man!
we ate so so much!
and my eu is really really a sly fox.extreme!
she par-kat with the waiter to get me a cake..
the moment she walked in.. she already whispered to him.and i didnt notice at all!
and when i was in the midst of telling them about my DG and how they sang so many times..
the guy zhunzun came from behind me with a cake and they started singing happy birthday to me!
haha. so sweet.

after lunch..we went to the waterfront to take photos and soak up the sun.gorgeous.
and then we watched "stomp the yard". wwooooo. i was so happy.
what other better show to watch than a bad-boy-turn-good-plus-good-dancing movie on my birthday!
haha.

eu and i headed back to school for our Xroads. SM appreciation night.as drew went for liling's baptism.

it was great fun la! caroline and i sang a song for joyce impromptu. and dawn and rebecca gave caroline and i a rose each! =)

at supper..i was stunned when suddenly all the crusaders started singing "happy birthday to you" out of the blue.
hahaha.

that day was ultimately perfect.


okay. crazy 23rd of march. phew.

my party day.
aaii..this one gave me one heck of an emotional roller coaster.
late in the morning.. my dad came and fetch roger's amp and i from school.
i went home for a while.then decided to go trim my hair and get some of my last min stuff at lot one.
which left me with little time to get ready and all.
hurried down to signature park's function room to get ready.
thankfully my aunt jen and re were there in time for the caterers.
and then my babes started coming down! and we started getting our decor up.

i was actually really hesitant about my party..it just feels weird knowing that people were coming down to celebrate your party..and just for you. aaii...gave me the heebee jeebees.

people started coming in..and it was such a busy night.
tad bit stressful too. haha.
but i really did enjoy myself on the whole. its great seeing people who are so important in your life get together.
=)

thank you all for coming and celebrating my 21st birthday party with me! =)
esp to all who helped me one way or another.
i absolutely loved the performances and presents! yayee!
made andrea a happy girl.hahaha.

oh. my photos that were taken by jason during the party is up..haha. thank you mr gorilla! whhee!
www.tysjason.multiply.com
[click on view all albums.]

and photos of my ponding-night is on marilyn's multiply!
www.marilvyn.multiply.com


phheewww..
all out.
haha. tadah!
i think this entry is a personal record. haha.

my 21st was a blast!

" don't think that because Singapore is such a small country, we would not be affected by the changes in the weather...One area in which singapore might get hit, is in the area of food."

.WOAH.
my pastor was mentioning that yesterday during service.
and it just hit me.
i never gave the end times much thought, blissfully ignorant, thinking that God might not be coming in our generation.
but looking at the rate things are changing, the degeneration of the moral standard, the crazy weather.
it is quite conceivable.
and i never gave it much thought until yesterday.
i never imagined that one day, i might be too poor to afford food when the prices inflate, and i will be really persecuted for my faith.
its a scary thought, to get persecuted. it really is.
you can't have any contact electronically with anyone, lest they track you.you can't purchase things without leaving evidence.

but you know what?

i want to be ready.
this isnt going to control me and place fear in me.
i want to stand up and be counted for.
God is positioning His church. He IS in control.

there are more important things in life.

"Lord, let my heart, attitude, mind and will, be Yours alone."

as the sunday school song so aptly go:
"i may never march in the infantry, ride over calvary, shoot the artillery.
i may never zoom over land and sea, but i'm in the LORD's army!
YES SIR!"

.people need the Lord.

someone
someone who would bring me to see the stars.
someone who would convince me everything would be alright,
even when i'm drowning in tears.
someone who could make my heart skip a beat.
someone who would take away all my peas!
someone who would point me in the right direction,
when i lose my heart's location.
someone who could seranade,
someone who would bring me to concerts at the esplanade!
someone who shares my greatest Love,
someone who in everything places Him above.

haha. since i have been recently "hired" to write rhymes, i just decided to write one.
and no..i'm not in love or anything. neither am i actively searching.
i know in His time, if anything happens, it happens.
but hey..a girl can dream right.
i think maths is driving me crazy.

In His time

In His time, in His time,
He makes all things beautiful, in His time,
Lord, please show me everyday,
As You're teaching me Your way,
That You do just what You say, in Your time.

In Your time, in Your time,
You make all things beautiful, in Your time.
Lord, my life to You I bring,
May each song I have to sing,
Be to You a lovely thing, in Your time.

teach me, Lord, to wait on You.

my hope is in You alone.

in Your perfect timing, let Your will be done in my life.

--warning: this isnt my birthday blog entry --

yes yes. i know i'm supposed to blog about my birthday.
but..i havent gotten the mood to blog all about it yet. so sorry.
hmm
but there is one thing i would like to tell you!
that God is good.

i woke up at 8am this morning to go have breakfast with yeye, caroline and veesan.
did my laundry after breakfast..
and went back to bed for about 1.5hours.
but i couldnt go to sleep. it was those moments when you're very exhausted, but you cant fall 100% asleep.
formulas for my MS2004 module was flying around..and my brain was trying to recall the two phenomena strain curves that can be explained using solute atoms hardening. ROAR.
save me.
so i woke up feeling even more drained.
i kept cramping today. it came.
was feeling moody and all. brain malfunctioned at sometimes too.
then had presentation for GV17. and then had to rush to tanjong pagar for my believermusic vocal class.

my transitions were all very smooth.
i managed to jog and catch the bus. the train came when i just arrived at the platform.
was studying for MS8005 on the train..on a semi-filled stomach.
was having a splitting headache when i got to BM.
couldnt sing properly. the song was in my bad key and my head wasnt letting up.
in dire need to get back to hall to rest.
and all my transitions went well again!
the most amazing is..after getting my dinner at jp..going to cross over to the busstop.
i prayed "Lord, please let 199 come soon.i really wanna go back faster."
and when i turned to look, 199 just turned the corner and was approaching the busstop.
"wow. You really know me really well. even on my moodiest of days, You never fail to find a way to show how much You love me, and make me happy."

the warm feeling i got..was the same as when my daddy suddenly offered to help order my food for me when he knew i was tired.
it totally warms my heart when someone does something for me without me asking, when they know how i'm feeling. it just shows how well the person knows you, ya know?

and God does it all the time..ALL THE TIME. even at times when i am not sensitive to Him, i know He's doing something wonderful.
totally brings a smile on my face. to know how much i'm loved.

"How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How great is the sum of them!" -Psalm 139:17
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD,
thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." - Jeremiah 29:11

so blessed.

[a mightily long post is coming your way!]

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

In Her Eyes - Josh Groban
She stares through my shadow
She sees something more
Believes there's a light in me
She is sure
And her truth makes me stronger
Does she realize
I awake every morning
With her strength by my side


Chorus*:
I am not a hero
I am not an angel
I am just a man
Man who's trying to love her
Unlike any other
In her eyes I am



This world keeps on spinning
Only she steals my heart
She's my inspiration
She's my northern star
I don't count my possession
All I call mine and give her completely
To the end of all time

(chorus*)

In her eyes I see the sky and all I'll ever need
In her eyes time passes by and she is with me

(chorus*)

How can one not absolutely LOVE josh groban when he croons such lovely lyrics?
-swoons-

"Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men." - 1 Corinthians 1:25

WOW.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
presenting the annual...
"what should i get for Andrea as a birthday present?" GUIDE!
this year is a special edition as she is turning the big 2-1 !!
-applause-

under the artistic category:
1. perform a song or dance item for her.
2. do a scrapebook of memories
3. do a photo collage/album of things that remind you of her and vice versa
4. draw a comic strip
5. produce and act out a skit for her! yay.
6. write a compilation of short stories!
7. a framed artwork from ikea. or any framed meaningful black and white photo.
[ i do still want a dance-themed artwork]

under the book category:
1. any cookbook by jamie oliver! [preferably one with most ingredients that are easily accessible in singapore]
2. a book with collections of photos/photography book.
3. music chords book, christian.
4. christian books about Pursuing God, or discipleship, or worship, or praying.[preferably an easy read]

under the music/entertainment category:
1. "cant hardly wait" vcd.
2."Josh Groban Live At the Greek" dvd. -beams-
3. Tap-dogs or STOMP! live in concert
4. T-bone's cd. [christian rap]
5. any nice christian cd actually. i need new songs in my life.
6.jamie cullum in concert.

under the random category:
1. bedsheets! that are colourful and stripey, or pattern-y. [her bed is single-size]
2. anything TIGGERIFIC, turquoise, yellow or striped.
3. tell her a joke.

under the serious category:
1. money. [to support my trip to Korea for my CM2007 conference.]

yupp. that's all folks.
and again..please be reminded that you are not obligated to give.
its just me growing one year older. with one more year of blessings to be grateful for.
=)

please contact Andrea, for booking or inquiries of presents. haha.

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything up to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start

Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for that day when they will care

--"have you ever" by brandy

one of my all-time favourite song.

quite a good day i must say.
at least somethings are settled.

laopo..thanks for always listening to me and being there. it really means alot. i will try not to worry you that much anymore k? for at least for a year. =)

oh. in church yesterday, we had our communion.
and it was exciting. in a funny way.
cos instead of the usual bread, WE HAD CHEPATTI!
haha.
we were all like giggling when we went back to our seats, we NEVER had chepatti for communion EVER!

me: its chepatti! and i got such a huge piece!
elvin: yeah! haha. its symbolic anyway.
me: but chepatti with grape drink? its gonna be very weird.
-after partaking-
me: that didnt go very well.
elvin: yar. since its all symbolic, why dont we substitute the drink for curry next time! when our youth take charge of communion next time, then we take orders la! who wants chicken, fish or mutton.

haha.
IMPORTANT NOTE: WE WERE JUST JOKING!
in no way are we disrespecting communion.

anyhoo..elvin and i have concluded..
that God has allowed our paths to cross for us both to learn patience.
and honestly, i CANNOT out-talk a lawyer.
especially not elvin yeo. HE DRIVES ME CRAZY!
he will throw me verses and i would just kenna stunned and not know what to say in my defense.
haha.


i have alot of monkeys in my life.

stop it andrea. stop it.
not everyone thinks the way you do.
not everyone's priorities are the same.
please.
stop it.
you're only hurting me.

ode to eugenia
you ask me many rhetorical questions
you make me do silly things
you teach me many valuable lessons
you listen to my ramblings

so many times you make me happy
so many times i make you cry
but still you love me dearly
and still we don't know why

you make funny noises
you make buzzing sounds
you make monkey faces
you cause me to put on pounds

i love you.

Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt,
that you may know how you ought to answer each one.
-colossians 4:6
The heart of the righteous studies how to answer,
But the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil.
-proverbs 15:28
How much better to get wisdom than gold!
And to get understanding is to be chosen rather than silver.
-proverbs 16:16
He who heeds the word wisely will find good,
And whoever trusts in the LORD, happy is he.
-proverbs 16:20

Grant me wisdom to know the right words to speak at the right time, teach me the way to answer, understanding in every situation, and unwavering trust in You, for it is in You that my heart is at rest and rejoices.

A man's heart plans his way, but the LORD directs his steps.-proverbs 16:9

Direct my steps according to Your Word, and may I be found holy as You are holy.

Refiner's fire.

Centre of My life

Let my walk speak loud
And my words be true
Let my life be whole and my eyes on You
Lord I'm stepping out, from the comfort zone
Letting go of me, holding on to You

Freedom comes, when I call You Lord
You are Lord, my God

You are the Centre of it all
The universe declares in awe
Your Majesty, I surrender all
I make You the Centre of my life
Lord I respond with all I am
You placed in me the song
Of Heaven's melody
Your Majesty, I live to sing Your song

I have found Your peace,
it replaces any fear
You have done it all, I can trust in You
Lord I'm stepping out, from the comfort zone
Letting go of me, holding on to You

This is Your song, not mine
It is Your song, that brings healing to this land
This is Your song, not mine
It is Your song, that brings freedom

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

EUGENIA LOH IS EMBARRASSING ME IN THE LIBRARY!
she's making ALOT of weird noises!
she's like coughing, sneezing and HICCUPING all at the same time.
LOUDLY!
someone please move her away from me.
someone actually shush-ed us.
roar.
hahahahhaa.
miss loh is so funny.
even when she doesnt mean to.
=)
today is gonna be a funny day.
i can feel..no..hear it. haha

HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY PORKIE PORK!!
haha!
today is porkie pork's birthday! he's also known as gabriel chen.
a group of us went to carnivore at vivo for lunch.
weiyee was so sweet to plan the surprise.
when we were all inside the restaurant awaiting their arrival.
we saw porkie walking about outsidE! how scary la.in an exhilarating way.
we all had to turn our heads and what not.
i love surprising people.

lunch was great. we had the buffet. took SSOOO many photos today.
marilyn took about 100+ photos.
unbelievable.

here's some! =)

the birthday boy and the whole bunch of us!

1!2!3!4!5!! haha. our act-cute photo. cindy, marilyn, grace, enting and i.

me in sneakers..."what's the big deal?" you may ask..
its because..

they are monkey's!!
and jem is wearing my HEELS! hahaha.madness.
i wanted to run away in his sneakers..but he threatened to break my heels. haha.
it was priceless seeing him in heels. haha.




i'm gonna be very sad when the year4s and 3s graduate.
my heart is slowly starting to break.
-violins in the background-
what would life be without them..
ohh tear.


we ended up at caroline's house to nua.
i like caroline's family. very warm. =)

all in all. good day.
great chinese new year.
oh yes.

date: monday. 19/2/07
place: my tuagu's balcony.

me : haha. did you see how you just ran? do it again! haha. you looked like a bird!
BEAKY: what? -runs back to original place- i just ran here like...-runs-GAHH!! hrmph! oh fine.
-runs back to original place again and then runs back with arms folded-
me: hahahaha. you're so retarded. HEY! why is that lady looking at us?! quick! duck!
-ducks below window sill-
beaky: YAR! -ducks too-
me: quick! -puts fingers into gun-mode -
beaky: haha. yar! -stands up- BANG!!
me: hahahaha. -sitting on the floor- hahahhaa. i can't believe you just did that!

and we both go into hysterics.

drey: what are you two doing? you all are retarded!

and then we slowly crawl away from the balcony so the lady in the next block cant see us.
haha.

I LOVE BEAKY!!
dont you love me too beaky?
-poke poke-
quick. tickle yourself. haha.

i need to start planning my birthday party.
aahh!

she falls on her knees and pray......



"dear Lord..please give me a guy who can sing like josh groban..
or at least willing to bring me to one of his concerts.."

HAHAHAHHA.

"but even if its neither..as long as he's your best."

haha.

the main point here is : i absolutely adore josh groban's voice. -melts-

chinese new year once again.
and i'm getting better at the game of "hide your things"
haha.
most of my cupboards are packed.
thankfully not bulging.
=)
i have alot of throwing out to do during the holidays.
roar.

its funny the things we do to give others a misconception.haha.

under the influence of my semi-emo cousin..
i found myself listening to cranberries' "linger"

But I'm in so deep
You know I'm such a fool for you
You got me wrapped around your finger
Do you have to let it linger?
Do you have to?
Do you have to?
Do you have to let it linger?

back to hiding..

sinful indulgences.
on thursday, after class.
eugenia bought a large packet of fries and large wedges too.
then jason drew eu and i dug in. and ate.
then when we finished..
andrew tang bought round 2!!
i just stood there gaping when he came back with the bag of large fries and wedges.
THEY ARE CRAZY!
usually when we go into our food frenzies, its just one round!
and on top of that..jason took out the bakkwa that he bought from eu.
i went to get our drinks, and came back to the sight of bakkwa on top of the huge pile of fries.
madness i tell you. madness.

drew eu and i..are partners in crime of sinful food indulgences.

eg1. when one goes: "i feel like eating tandoori chicken."
another will go :" hmm..yar! me too."
and the third one will go : "yay! okay. lets!"

eg2. when one goes: " i feel like eating the yoghurt ice-cream."
another : "hey ya!"
third: "oh no..aahhh!! i feel like it now too! aahh!"

eg3. one: i feel like eating fries.
another : with ice cream!
third: yeahh! with ice cream!

and like this..we always end up buying one per person.
its madness. no sound of reason.
haha.

friday:
we had our crusade reunion dinner at some steam boat restaurant at bugis.
it was fun sitting with jon, drew, grace, rachel and enting. crazy bunch.
jon kept telling lame jokes/statements.
eg. when he was fishing out the corn " your corn was stuck in the corner!"
just random statements like that.
haha.
and i embarrassed myself a few times.
when the guy came to top up our soup,
i was standing up. then i started "dancing". cos the song "culo remix" was stuck in my head.
then apparently the guy stood behind me and stared at me for a while with a "confused" look and then he started laughing at me!
and jon started laughing when he saw the guy laugh at me!
jon is so evil right! he should have warned me when i was embarrassing myself! argh.
and the second time i embarrassed myself was when grace and i went to the toilet.
and they have the beady curtain thing at the door post, its only abt one third of the door, so i "limbo-rocked" under the beads, and then this guy was coming out, so i immediately straightened when i saw him.
argh.
i shouldnt be let out of the house on days like these.
roar.

dinner was fun. dessert [mango and sago. say it a few times. its fun.] was shiokadelic.

i'm blessed with so many people in my life.
haha.
happy chinese new year everyone!
=)

how is it that i feel so bare, even without any contact.
how is it that when a part of you lives, a part of me dies.
how can you shake my very core though you've been distant and silent all this while.
how?

fly me to the moon and let me play among the stars.

i love looking at the stars. they just give me such a feeling of contentment.

last night was fun. we went running..quite a big group of us.
and then we went on to the top of our ADM building to play with sparklers and talk and look at the stars.
it was lovely.
Thank You for stars. they are so small, yet they bring such warmth to my heart.
those moments of playing with sparklers with your good friends, singing songs while lying under the stars, and just drinking in the atmosphere of it all, and just basking in His creation, is one of the most gorgeous moments in my life.
its like when you are revealed a mystery of God's love, and it just captures your heart.

it was a great way to usher valentine's day. thanks jason for the ADM suggestion. =)

today..
i went to holland village settler's with some of my favourite pple. =)
namely, ayeeba, amlah, shir, lembu, abu and abu's ryan. haha.
it was great seeing them again. as always.
sorry for being mellower than usual. =) maybe i'm growing out of being a toys'r'us kid? haha.
and ayeebaboon..its my pleasure to go out with you. haha.

hmmm...but yet in the midst of my social gatherings..
i'm once again going into hermit mode soon. argh.
i have so much to do. yet i am running away from it all.
i have no time for myself to just remain still.

happy valentine's day everyone. =)

my mass msg to pple today:
roses are red. violets are blue.
my life would be empty,
if i didnt meet you.
with all my heart...happy valentine's day babes!

@--}----

its time to move along. let go and move along. guard at all costs. you can't lose what you never had.

I think I'm going crazy, can't take it anymore
Got one thing on my mind all the time
And it's driving me crazy, I think I'm going crazy
And I don't know what I'm doing
Ijust can't take your grace in my face
Cause it's driving me crazy
-"crazy" by The Moffatts.

we should hold a gathering and just sit around in a circle and just sing all of the Moffatts songs that we love.
just like that memorable day in primary 6 when we just stayed back, sat down and sang.
bring back the days when we have no other responsibilities and had so much time in our hands.
i keep reliving my primary school day memories. i dont wish to grow up. but the big 2-1 is looming ahead. sigghh.. anyone got a time machine?

Saw you this morning, with that look in your eyes
I hate to see you looking like, you're lost and lonely
It isn't easy when you're all by yourself
Don't you worry, I hear you 'cause I know what it's like
And if you look you'll find, I got you on my mind 'cause baby

I'll be there for you
When you need sombody I'll be there for you
When you want someone who cares
When you're down and feeling blue I'll be there I'll be there for you
When you call me, I'll be there I wanna show you how good it will be

Never needed anyone the way I need you right now
You know you'll never be alone anymore
We can make it, together It's gonna be all right
And if you look you'll find, I got you on my mind 'cause baby

-"i'll be there for you" by The Moffatts.

campus day of prayer!
let me hear a "woot! woot!".
haha. so retarded.
cant stand myself.

anyway..
yesterday marked our first big campus day of prayer.
where we tried to rally the christians in ntu to pray and intercede for our campus.
it is amazing how God closed all the doors for us to get other venues.
but He indeed does not hold out on us.
He gave me the hugest, grandest venue in our whole campus!
THE NANYANG AUDITORIUM!
[sitting capacity: abt 1000].

in maths tutorial in the morning,
drew eu and i were just talking.
wondering how many pple were gonna turn up for the event. and eu mentioned that God spoke to her in the morning that it is not the matter of the number of people who comes, but rather their heart's condition. and that we should appreciate everyone of those who come down.[ abt 200+ pple came down i think. =) ]

sidetrack: i absolutely adore it when the three of us have a serious conversation about God and what He spoke to us. its one of the best things of our friendship that i really hold dear to. cos we can go from really random retarded things [like clapping rhythms in the stairwells] to serious sharing of God's Word. it always always warms my heart to hear what God has been speaking to them, and to share with them things that i get impressed with as well. Gorgeous i tell you. gorgeous.

so anyhoo..after class jessica and i came back to my class to change to our dresses.
haha. it feels good to dress up once in a while.
lyrics of shania twain's "man, i feel like a woman" come to mind.
hahaha.
we managed to get crystal and jix last min to do backup singing.
cos initially it was just me backup and shaohong as worship leader.
the two of them can harmonize la!
i wanna learn how to harmonize!
but i know that im too scared to try. cos i will have to be out-of-tune a few times before i can finally get the notes for harmony. roar.

worship went really well. could really sense the passion of the worshippers. and God's sweet presence was evident.

thanks babe for praying for me. for submitting my heart and spirit to God. i needed it. and i felt a breakthrough. though not dramatic. but its a start. something exciting is going to happen. i'm re-energising! haha. love you dear.

all in all. thursday rocked.
as always. i love seeing the ones i love.haha.
oh yes. and ng weiyee is very naughty.
she kept focussing the camera on me, so i was constantly projected on the BIG SCREEN in the AUDI!
after the whole event la. when pple were just lingering and chatting. she is very naughty.
very naughty!

into Your hands, i commit again. with all i am, for You Lord.

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save
‘Til on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in victory
Sin’s curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt of life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life’s first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
‘til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand

its amazing how some beautiful songs are left in your mp3 player and you never realised you had them. this song is one of them. i only just discovered its beauty. the lyrics are so assuring, dont you think? =)
on Christ the solid rock i stand, all other ground is sinking sand.

from today's daily bread [online]:

In part, this is what Jesus was challenging us to understand in Matthew 5:13-16. Salt and light are influential factors in a dark and corrupting world, and Christ, who is the Light of the world, calls us to be lights of influence as well. The Master who modeled perfect purity calls us to be salt that adds flavor and prevents corruption.

May we not only be influenced by Christ but also be influencers for Christ in a needy world. —Bill Crowder

Lord, let me be a shining light
In all I say and do,
That Your great love displayed in me
May lead someone to You. —Sper

As the "salt of the earth," Christians will make others thirsty for the "Water of Life."

be extra kind to someone today,
because every one is fighting a battle.
- a quote my Pastor read from somewhere.

let me be a Shining Light.

AAAAHHH!!! EUGENIA LOH BLUFF SPIDER!!
i DID NOT psycho her to jump on the bus!!!!!
DID NOT!! D-I-D N-O-T!!

this is what happened...while on the shuttle bus on our way back to my hall.
seated at the last row...
me: you know. last time in secondary school, i would tompang the primary school bus sometimes. and the small girls will always run to the back row and jump in their seat when the bus goes over a hump. cos you'll get to suspend in the air longer.
eugenia: ok. when is the next hump?
NOTE: SHE INITIATED US TO TRY IT!!
me: i dont think we have any more humps.
eu: ok. why dont we jump when the bus turns!
me: cannot la! i will hit my face on the glass! [i was seated at the side]
eu: hahahahha. but can..almost the same effect.
so when the bus turned, i jumped a bit. not shiok.
then finally a hump came..
both: coming coming!
-front tyre goes over the hump-
eu: -JUMPS- : hey why you never jump?
-back tyre goes over hump-
me: -jumps- WWOOAAHH!!
eu: -laughs nonstop-
-we alight-
me: kuku la you! must jump when the back tyre goes over what! why you jump when the front tyre goes over? hahaha.
eu: -still laughing- i felt it! but you jumped so much higher than me! i should have videoed it down! hey..turn your comp on later ok? this is so bloggerable.

---the end--

so you see.. its HER IDEA to do that retarded thing.
i admit i do psycho her to do some retarded things sometimes.. but she's the one who actually chooses to listen to me!
everyone knows not to listen to andrea!
hahaha. [except rebecca! haha. she hasnt learnt it entirely well yet. haha. -love you re.-]

eugenia is so fun to play with. hahaha.

additional: i got a new blogskin! and i love it! =)

its funny how finally my mind is catching up with my body.
i've been running myself too busy. now my mind just tells me to keep silent.
feel like isolating myself and just hiding in my room.
if you find me quieter these few days..just understand that i'm going through a rest stage.
this stage doesnt come often. but it sure is welcomed.
its not that i am getting grumpier or cranky.
just dont really feel like talking and socialising much.
i really just want to hide in my room.

i need to find rest.
both physically and for my soul.
not spending enough time in my Shelter House.
i need more time. to catch up with my work.
to just relax and not worry about anything.
to just be still.
i want 30 hours a day!haha.
but yes yes..i know. it boils down to my own time management.

realised today..when i looked at my organiser that it is THIS sunday that i am taking worship.
i thought it was next.
yay for me..i've got 6 singing commitments over the span of 2 weeks.
and a sharing to do for oasis.
i'm scared.
i feel inadequate.
keep me in prayer. especially for my health.
empower me.

my GV17 module's presentation is tomorrow.
and i still am unsure whether i should really sing "who am i" by casting crowns.
i'm nervous. roar.
emotional upheaval?
perhaps. roar.

all i want is to find myself in a prayerful and worshipful mood.
to have peace. and rest.
rest.

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. - Matthew 11:28&29

not the greatest rapper- 1000 clowns

I know I'm not the greatest rapper in the world

But would ya, would ya, would ya please be my girl?

I know I'm not the greatest rapper in the world

But would ya, would ya, would ya please be my girl?

I know I'm not the greatest rapper in the world

But please baby, please baby be my girl.

I know I'm not the greatest rapper in this land

But I'll do anything if you'll hold my hand.

MY FAVOURITE SONG OF ALLL TIME!! THANK YOU MR ANDREW TANG THE GREAT!

woohoo. today started off early.

830 lab.

but i made new friends today at lab.

which was good. and at least chivalry was proven to be alive when one of the guys helped me sandpaper my steel sample. =) yay.

im happy. happy.happpyy.

haha. anyhoo..today i almost went crazy rushing my two lab reports.

argh. its amazing what university does to you. one of the reports is one of my worst i have ever smoked out. argh. but at least its a lil comforting to know that lab is only 1 AU.

i guess to a certain extent, Mr David Loh has placed this mental thought in my mind that lab is a serious thing, and has to be done properly.

remember all the solemn-ness in our labs, the silence, the cold stares he gives when you talk. amazing what the mind does to you.

i need more drive in my life i think.

more Spirit of Excellence.

ROAR.

WARNING!

CAROLINE TEOH JEN WEI IS VERY NAUGHTY! AND HIGHLY RETARDED!

ALL PERSONNELS PLEASE KEEP AWAY FROM THIS HAZARDOUS SPECIMEN!

on a serious note.

she really is.

we were walking through the canteen to come up to the library just now.

i was walking at the normal pace, and suddenly i dont see her walking alongside me.

so i turned to see where she was at. and there she was! walking a snail rate. the best part: ON PURPOSE!

so i walked back..grabbed her hand..and walked.

caroline : WAAAHHH!! -fake cry- i dont want to go to the principal's office!

me: -stunned for a while- NO LOR! you've been very naughty. he's gonna scold you.

so i "dragged" her to the library. and made her say sorry to the bust of Lee Wee Nam. our favourite library caretaker..who also happens to be the one who paid for our library. haha.

so she went and said sorry to him. its quite retarded. it amazes me how her brain works.

and so our nicks on msn now are:

Caroline: ANDREA LEE QING!!! Go and say sorry to LWN.. GO!

dRea - CAROLINE TEOH JEN WEI!! GO AND KISS LWN NOW!! naughty lor.

she lights up my life.

ohh! i never mentioned! im on a daniel fast now.

ie. cannot eat meat.

and i am dying! how does twin do it!!??

i cant do without meat.

now i really know that meat is indeed a luxury and God is indeed my Provider. haha.

campus day of prayer is coming. i'm excited to see what God has in store.

its exciting following Christ, no?

woohoo.

even as you pray, you can feel the peace of God.
even as you pray, you can hear the voice of God.
thank You, for Your chastening allowing me to know that i am being molded.
thank You for Your Word.
thank You for trials that come my way.
i WILL count it all JOY.

we are one body of Christ.

You are so personal. so intimate. so loving.
Never fail to amaze me.

restless.unsettled.
those are the words that best fit my moods these days.
perhaps its the accumulated lack of sleep.
perhaps its the amount of work that i think i have to tackle but have yet to do it.
but mostly i think its because of my thoughts that have been running about often.

pensive.reflective.
in dire need to be humbled.
why boast of a gift? it is, in its essence, a gift.
of no merit, of no price.
a gift is a gift is a gift.
i need to learn that.
God has been prompting me, and it is yet another hard lesson to learn.
one humbling lesson after another.
perhaps if i had gotten another gift, it would not be so much of a struggle.
but God is in control of every situation.
every thing has its perfect purpose.
and i thank You.
if it were any other gift, my heart would be broken.
my life without a song.
i enjoy every moment.
but i need to focus on the cause of action.
Help me, Lord. every move i make, be it out of love, and not pride.
every one is given a different measure of grace, lest anyone should boast.

Spirit of Excellence.
where is it?
no where to be found.
ingrain colossians 3:23 in me.

i need to realign myself with You.
i need to spend time with You.
i need to stop running.
yet again.
stop running.
i'm sorry Lord.

i ushered in the new year multiple times last night.
with my youth, we counted down abt over 5 times?
haha. every watch tells a different time.
it was fun.

meta was great. assurance of His love and just a subtle change of my heart.
i needed it.
and i'm glad i experienced and got to know Him so much better through the times of worship and sharings.

so many things to be thankful for in 2006.
You answered my prayer and fulfilled my desire. Lord, i want more.
grew so much in 2006, and i'm looking forward to 2007, to serve Him more and in turn depend on His strength so much more. to be His light and His witness.
empower me.

2007 is going to be exciting, seeing growth in not only myself, but in the ones around me.
exciting things are gonna happen this year! i can feel it!

physical health is at its low now. thought i was better, but the cough and nose problems are coming on stronger.
but no worries, Jehovah Rophe will heal me soon. yay.

so after all the words and what not..all i want to say is..

HAPPY NEW YEAR! may 2007 be a year where God's goodness be poured out and proclaimed!

Lord prepare me to be a sanctuary.